Saturday Zoe had a recital at the home of her piano teacher. Honestly, I felt kind of weird afterward. Zoe's piano piece was SOOO much more advanced than the other performers. This was a recital for all the kids, more than half were older, mostly middle school kids.
Zoe played last and then there was a pizza party. During her piece and after there was a weird tension in the group. We were all sitting in this room in a circle around the piano and harp.So I could see the facial expressions and body language of all the families. And I got a weird vibe. Like there was some hostility. Not directed towards Zoe overtly, just a general depression of satisfaction from the other parents.
Back in Los Angeles, Zoe was a top student with a top teacher in a big city. The piece she played Saturday was not that much harder than the hardest piece she learned when she was five and studying under that Russian teacher in L.A.. When we moved to a small town in the Midwest I figured it was okay for Zoe to not take piano so seriously for awhile. Her teacher in L.A. was always pushing it to be the main thing in Zoe's life, she didn't really understand that Zoe was gifted in lots of areas and that piano wasn't her one big thing.
With her old teacher back in L.A. Zoe was the most talented for her age but there were a couple of students with the same type of talent who were older. These were other PG kids. So recitals weren't so obviously lop-sided.
The lopsidedness of the recital on Saturday actually made me uncomfortable and now I am thinking that maybe Zoe needs a different piano/voice teacher. Is that a strange reaction?
But we both really like this teacher, she is kind and good and has a good relationship with Zoe. So why change?
Well, Pere has been complaining that Zoe seems to be moving so much slower with this teacher. But I always felt like it was more important that Zoe was happy. (She used to get stressed out with her old Russian teacher.)
But now I am worried that teaching Zoe is out of her league. :( I feel like she also doesn't have the contacts and resources to give Zoe the performance opportunities she would like. I feel like there are probably teacher's in our town who have some experience with talent like Zoe has. But I wonder if that is really that important.
What should I do? It is easy enough not to change anything. Zoe likes her teacher and her current song really was complex and difficult. So the teacher does challenge her to a certain extent. But now that it really hit home that Zoe is BY FAR her most advanced student I feel like she is a big fish in a small fish bowl that she might not be able to grow in.
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Okay ... if Zoe has not, at this point, decided she's going to be a professional pianist -- if she's playing for the joy of playing -- then why does it matter that she's the teacher's most advanced student? It's not like they had the heard start she did. And she's not in competition against them -- in fact, she probably only sees them at recitals. IMO, if she's happy with her current progression and stress level, and the teacher is giving her pieces that further the complexity and understanding of music that she needs to grow, isn't that what's important? If you'd rather focus on networking and performance opportunities, you might need to change at some point, yes. But it sounds to me like this is a good teacher who's making music enjoyable for Zoe.
ReplyDeleteMiakoda
ReplyDeleteThanks for responding.
I dunno. Maybe sometimes I'm crazy... :P
I don't think she is in competition with the other students. She doesn't see them very often.
My therapist told me I worry to much about what other people think and if the parent's were feeling jealous then, to quote my therapist "They can screw off." :S
In L.A. really good teacher's were in high demand and they could choose to have the really good students. They offered a lot. It is the same idea of going to a top college with the better professors.
I think most people do better and feel better when they are getting the appropriate challenge, too much is stressful, too little is boring.
I would say that her old teacher in LA was too stressful. Some of my readers will remember me complaining about that. She wanted Zoe to devote her life to piano and practice 3 hours a day so that she could parade Zoe around at competitions. I think she really cared about Zoe but there was this Russian immigrant mentality that Zoe should make sacrifices to make the most out of her gift.
I think her new teacher is on the less challenging side. She is doing a good job. She is. But I worry that she isn't going to be able to be Zoe's teacher in the long run.
We have been there done that. And I don't have an answer.
ReplyDeleteHow about when you get the least amount of applause, and I know for a fact she puts in the most time. One parent said, "How come she got to play four pieces?" OMG THIS IS A CHILD, and where should she play what she has mastered if not at a recital? The teacher lost half his students.
He started to warn parents and show them video before he took a new student. For over a year DD was playing mostly private events. She played with no kids or kids older and talented.
In the end he referred us. Now she is in a situation where everyone is older and better.
I don't know what you should do. It was my spouse who did all the advocating, made the final decision. He felt the joy was being taken from her for various reasons. And she was confused about what is showing off. I came to the same conclusion slower though I agreed.
Oh the kids she played with were not her teachers students, they were kids from all over the area. One of them is studying down the hall from her now.
ReplyDeleteI guess if you're worried about the other parents, you could always tell a healthy lie to direct attention away from Z. You could tell them that Z is a huge Noel Streatfeild fan and that these books inspired her to practice like crazy. This way you make up for the lie by promoting great age appropriate children's literature and passionate piano practice. You could call it a public service!!!!
ReplyDeleteRe: opportunity . . . Does your local college offer any sort supplemental piano enrichment? Do you have a piano guild or a junior orchestra?
Mariposa... that just sucks. What is wrong with people??
ReplyDeleteAmi is amazing. I can't wait to hear her play some day. (And I promise I won't give you the cold shoulder afterward.)
Anonymous, that would be funny. They would probably find an answer like that totally acceptable.
ReplyDeleteI guess it would depend on Zoe's goals...does she want a career in music or is it something that she's really good at and just enjoys doing on the side? I agree that if one has a special talent, they should try to develop it to it's fullest- however from personal experience, I know there are things I do really well- but have no real interest in making it my primary area of focus in life.
ReplyDeleteI would just ignore those parents....there are "haters" everywhere in life.
((hugs)) I agree with your therapist.;-)
ReplyDeleteCher,
ReplyDeleteWe have had the pleasure of hearing Ami at multiple occaisions, and it is indeed worth it! FYI, I LOVE to hear piano music, so any time the kiddos want an audience, I am game ;) Mine dropped piano, as she was frusterated all the time, so I don't get to hear it anymore. :(
I hope teh new teacher works out well.
Mariposa,
I am so sorry about the way they treated Ami. :(
Forte